Blog

Conscious focus is a choice

To start to train the mind we have to understand that we have a choice in the way we focus our creative ability and reclaim our ability to choose. This can be difficult at first. The negative habits of the mind are habits and the ego is a protection mechanism. The ego doesn’t want to relinquish control. If it relinquishes control, how will you be protected? Protected from what? From irrational emotional wants that can never ...

Beliefs

Many of our beliefs are created by the way people relate to us, especially when we are children. Do these beliefs of the ego work for us or do they create problems for us? Sadly the negative beliefs strip us of our ability to be happy and to achieve what we would like to bring into our lives. These beliefs are not you. You were not born with them and they are nothing more than irrational fears. The positive unlimited ...

Imagination

Our imagination fills in the gaps of perception.

We create our reality through our imagination, so what are we creating? So many people create drama in their lives because that’s what they imagine through a system of wanting. They see a lack in their lives and are left lacking. What is wrong with seeing this world as a world of adventure and ...

Boss Managers

Boss Managers disconnect and disempower staff through negative feedback or disconnecting habits or no feedback at all. (When talking about boss managers I am talking about the bossy people that use these disconnecting habits all the time on subordinates thinking they are controlling them.) They see mistakes as opportunities to blame. They destroy morale. They think that they are the ones that get the results. Staff don’t enjoy being around a boss manager. Many don’t enjoy going to work ...

Lead Managers

Lead Managers will connect with and empower staff through positive feedback and connecting habits. They see mistakes as opportunities to learn; they build morale and they know the team creates the results. Staff will enjoy coming to work. They are creative and they take less time off. They feel they belong to a team. Most will feel an obligation to work hard and do well, they focus on their work and solutions. Lead Managers create a culture of positive ...

The seven disconnecting habits are:

Criticising, complaining, nagging, blaming, threatening, punishing, bribing.

Even the best of parents will have used these disconnecting habits at some time on their children. A great number of bosses use these disconnecting habits on their staff. It’s the way people bully each other. These are the habits we use to control someone (although they only serve to make the other person feel disconnected and disempowered). The interesting thing about these habits is that the person using them ...

The formation of many beliefs

What you believe is what you see

The old saying ‘seeing is believing’ is the wrong way around. What we believe is what we see. So where do much of our beliefs come from? Most of our beliefs about ourselves, our lives and others come from the way others relate to us and communicate with us. Many of ...

The want to escape

The want to escape is a distortion of the need for freedom and fun. It usually rears its head because we are stuck in the other wants; approval, control and security. Suicide is the ultimate want to escape. It is the want to escape the current situation or responsibilities in life. You can’t escape the ups and downs, or the twists and turns of life. It’s a roller coaster ride – not a flat road. Many addictions ...

The want for control

The want for control is a distortion of the need for empowerment.

Empowerment is to have an influence over things in your life. This need for empowerment is often distorted into wanting to control things. You can’t even control your body as it ages. You can’t control another person as most parents find out with regard to their children. Control is just an illusion. It’s like a want for certainty, but nothing is certain. Anger and frustration have ...

The Want for Approval

The want for approval is a distortion of the need for love and connection.

Is it possible to get one person’s approval all the time? Not likely! Ask my wife. If I could get her approval all the time it would be fantastic, but I am not perfect. I have my faults just like everyone else. Could I get everyone’s approval? No, not much chance of that happening.

The fear of public speaking has its roots in the want ...